Learn To Be Patient With Your Spouse

There are situations that make you lose your patience. Identifying what in your partner is causing you to lose your peace of mind is the best way to control your reactions. Here are some tips to help you learn to be patient with your spouse.

It is said that patience is a virtue cultivated daily, but sometimes we do not know where to start. Today, we are used to everything being instant and express . But in a relationship, sometimes you have to learn to be tolerant. In this article, we tell you how to be patient with your partner. Of course it is possible!

Keys to being patient with your partner

Being patient with your spouse is a trait of a mature person. From a person who takes into account not only their needs, but also those of others. And of a being who can understand the one he loves. In theory, that sounds great, but how do you do it in practice? These keys can help you:

1. Identify what is causing you to lose your patience

It’s the starting point. Because while there can be a lot of things that can irritate you, there are probably only one or two main causes (which then trigger less important ones).

For example, leaving everything in a mess, not listening to you when talking to him, spending a lot of money, etc. can be reasons for exasperation. Once you identify the cause of your anger, it will be easier to find a solution by working on it.

2. Recognize yourself as your partner

This means that – perhaps the fact that you’re irritated at seeing all the mess – has to do with some trauma from your past. When in your childhood, your mother got mad at you if you didn’t put your toys away.

Or maybe you had a partner who demanded your full attention or made a scene on you every time you went shopping. Remember that we transfer our shortcomings and our suffering to the one who accompanies us.

3. Be aware of his feelings

It’s time to pay a little more attention to how the person who accompanies you feels every day. To be patient with your partner, you have to put yourself in their shoes, even if it can be difficult at times. Why is he leaving his clothes lying around? What makes him spend all this money? Why isn’t he paying attention to you?

Understanding the other is one of the most difficult tasks in a relationship, but the good news is that when you cross the “I” threshold and pay attention to your surroundings, everything gets better.

4. Soften your reactions

Following the example of the mess in the bedroom, a good way to be patient with your partner is to say, “Do you want me to help you clean up your affairs?” Instead of always saying the same thing, “I’m tired of always having to put everything behind you”.

The other person’s reaction will be completely different depending on the tone of voice and the words you use. In the first case, you invite him to “work as a team” and in the second, you blame him for a repetitive attitude. Which of the two do you think will give you the best results?

5. Speak openly

Maybe you are impatient with your partner because you’ve never told them what’s wrong. The other person doesn’t have a crystal ball!

You may think that getting angry, yelling, or repeating blames will do some good. But the best way to get the other person to think about it or “find out” what is going on is to speak sincerely.

Let her know how you feel when you come home and the house is a mess. What do you think if he spent too much money. What goes on in your head when he’s not paying attention.

Your partner probably isn’t doing it with the intention of bothering you or because he’s a bad person. Often, we have so many problems that we don’t pay attention to certain things.

6. Count to 10

This rule can help you in any situation where you think you are about to explode and need to calm down. If you find yourself in a situation that makes you lose your mind, start counting slowly while taking deep breaths.

Sometimes you just need that little break to calm yourself down and put things in perspective. If you walk into a room and everything is a mess, instead of yelling and getting angry, take a breath, count to 10, then talk to your partner about how you (both) can put the things away. clothing.

This will avoid not only an argument, but also a stressful and damaging crisis for your health.

7. Be more flexible

An ancient teaching says that “bamboo is stronger because of its ability to sway in the wind, but the tree can split because of its stiffness”. This means that sometimes we have to be a little more tolerant of each other.

Of course, it’s not about letting him do what he wants, but understanding that you are different and that your habits or rules don’t always apply to him. Flexibility also means adapting to the situation and not waiting for the other to change overnight.

8. Avoid express service

Today we are used to everything being instantaneous, but a relationship is not the same as a coffee or a burger. We need to spend quality time with those we love, get to know them, know what is happening to them, listen to them, pay attention to them …

Everyone has their own time to change certain habits, and sometimes a change can take years. We are not all equal, proactive or effective at what we do. And to be patient with your partner, you need to remember this every day.